Breakeven
by 9rayofsunshine7
Summary: Based on the song, 'Breakeven' by the Script.  In the end she was the bad-guy. She was too prideful to say it aloud, but she missed him. He'd moved on and she was left to grieve, picking up the pieces that he'd so graciously smashed.  One-shot.


**My first Total Drama story, it's a one-shot, but it counts. (;**

**YOU'VE BEEN DISCLAIMED, things that don't belong to...me.**

**The above sounded cooler in my head, the below makes me 'all choked up'. xD**

Courtney sat alone. In the lunchroom when all the other kids were flocked together in groups of three and four, talking about their days so far, and whose hair was a 'do' and and whose was a 'don't'. In the classroom when all the 'cool' kids opted to sit in the back, she stayed up front. She didn't have many friends, she never had, but it was starting to impact her. It seemed that nobody liked her, her parents were always busy, she was losing focus, and Duncan, her boyfriend of two years, had cheated on her with one of her only friends, Gwen. In the end _she_ was the bad-guy. She was too prideful to say it aloud, but she missed him. He'd moved on and she was left to grieve, picking up the pieces that he'd so graciously smashed.

She'd recently gotten into music, she'd always played the violin, but this music was different. It was expressive and it was helping, she wasn't healed, but it was a start. She'd written a song, and was planning to sing it at the school's Talent Showcase. You weren't required to perform, but you had to watch and listen to others do their thing, so you'd might as well perform yourself.

She sat alone in the choir room trying and failing to play the correct chords on her guitar. "Stupid guitar," she cursed, running a hand through her mocha locks in frustration. She looked around at the lifeless room and sighed, putting the guitar and placing her face in her hands. She gathered her things, giving up. She'd make a fool of herself if she tried to do it on her own. She'd written the song for a _band. _She had to way to put one together on such short notice.

"Why'd you stop?" A voice asked from the door and Courtney nearly died. She looked up to be met by two pairs of eyes; one green and the other brown.

Her eyes narrowed, "Why do you care, Trent?" she asked, harshly, but her voice lacked the venom. Trent rolled his eyes and took her guitar.

"You're obviously having a hard time, and it's the right thing to do." he shrugged, "Could I see the sheet music?"

Courtney nodded.

"DJ, do you think you could get a steady drum beat?" he asked the taller boy. DJ shrugged.

"I could try,"

Courtney returned with the music and handed a copy to each boy. "Good luck trying to salvage my disaster,"

"Shouldn't be so hard," Trent half smiled.

They spent half an hour discussing the song and putting it together. DJ found a steady beat and Trent volunteered to ask Geoff if he could play bass. In the end, Courtney had made two new friends. _Friends_, the word sounded foreign in her mind, but she liked it.

**::: ::: :::**

Trent met up with Geoff after school, he'd been hanging out with Duncan and Gwen. The awkwardness could not be described. He'd waved politely at the two and turned to the cowboy-hatted surfer.

"Geoff, I need your help," Trent told him.

"Oh, okay, what's the deal, dude?" Geoff replied, crossing his arms, ready to listen.

"DJ, Courtney, and I are-" Geoff cut him off.

"Courtney?" he asked, his eyebrows raised and a look of shock across his face.

"Yes, and I would appreciate it if you didn't interrupt me." Trent glared half-heartedly. "As I was saying, we need a bassist for our 'band', Courtney wrote this amazing song and it wouldn't be complete unless you helped."

Geoff pondered it. "Why?"

"Please!" Trent nearly begged.

The conversation had gotten Gwen's attention. "_Courtney _wrote a song," she asked in disbelief, "And a good one? Doesn't that take, like, emotion?"

Trent narrowed his eyes, "She's not as terrible as you'd think, and she's a human. Emotion and feeling is a part of the deal."

The goth remain silent, a look of guilt etched on her face.

Geoff shrugged after a minute, "I'm in," he grinned.

The two boys fist-bumped and walked away, leaving Duncan and Gwen with their thoughts.

**::: ::: :::**

The day of the performance came and Courtney was scared out of her mind. "I can't do this." she squeaked.

DJ, Trent, and Geoff looked at her in disbelief.

"You're Courtney," Geoff shook his head, "Strong-willed, talented, and...well, Courtney."

"Trust me, Courtney, you'll do great," Trent assured, smiling warmly. "I promise."

The CIT nodded and rubbed her forearms. The band had agreed on a uniform, black pants, collared shirts, and ties. Courtney had opted to wear a plaid skirt and was regretting it now. "What if they laugh at us? Or, like, I don't know, throw food!" She tugged on the hem.

The audience out front applauded as the group before them finished their routine, "Wasn't that just fantastic?" the emcee asked the crowd, clapping along with them..

Trent and Geoff each grabbed one of Courtney's hands. "Calm down," they whispered as the tan girl whimpered.

The emcee chuckled, "Okay, next up we have a new band, from what I've heard they're really neat, give it up for 'Generation Nine'!" he annouced and gestured to for the group to walk out.

DJ almost had to carry Courtney out. The group took their places and began to play.

Deep breaths, Courtney said as a mantre in her head.

"I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in

'Cause I got time while she got freedom

'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even,"

She sang, her eyes closed tightly, her heart nearly banging out of her chest.

"Her best days will be some of my worst

She finally met a man thats gonna put her 1st

While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping

Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven,"

She got into the song, feeling the intensity. She sang the verses, each word coated with anger, hurt, and every other emotion she could. She soon reached the last few verses.

"You got her heart and my heart and none of the pain

You took your suitcase, I took the blame.

Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains

Cos you left me with no love, no love to my name!"

Courtney felt tears welling up in her eyes.

" I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in

Cos I got tI'me while she got freedom

Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break even...

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you

What am I suppose to say when I'm all choked up and your ok

I'm falling to pieces

I'm falling to pieces

(one still in love while the other ones leaving

Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven)"

Geoff placed out the rest of the song and it faded into silence. The audience burst into applause, standing, 'WOOT'ing, and it felt so good.

Courtney had never felt so loved, while the audience applauded the boys pulled her into a hug and she let it all out, crying as hard as she could.

**::: ::: :::**

The next day, Courtney sat with _people_. She wasn't alone anymore. In the lunchroom Geoff and DJ had decided to sit with her, bringing the entire football team with them. She was surrounded. In the classroom, people sat in the front and the back was left empty.

She **wasn't **alone.

She wasn't alone...but she was lonely. Her story didn't have it's fairytale ending, she decided.

Duncan approached the table without Gwen (Hallelujah!) and they talked, emotions were worked out and possibilities showed their faces.

It wasn't perfect...but it was something.

**I'm sure you'll agree with me in saying that the ending was just...pathetic. ): Sorry, I'm just no good at endings. xD I'm sort of happy with the beginning, the singing part was 'meh' and I couldn't delivered this much better, but I didn't...and I'm mad at myself. Maybe I'll rewrite it someday...**

**Review, please! :D**


End file.
